Love is Real

Love is real, for I have found it with a man, and I will cherish it forever. 

You see, before him, love didn’t exist. It was false. It was fallacy. Before him my soul was misguided, abused, and naïve.

The night we first met, his hazel eyes were sweet, gentle, coy. Glancing across dark rooms full of laughter, lust, and buffoonery. Lurking behind long fluorescent red tubes filled with flavored tobacco. Those eyes were pining for affection, yearning for the attention of mine, and desperate to catch one receiving glance to ensure that its heart’s desire wasn’t in vein.

His voice was pitchy, as if manhood had missed him by just a split second. His demeanor projected confidence, but his eyes and his words would state otherwise. He was caught up in his ramblings afraid my borrowed ear wasn’t quite open. Scatting in insecurity and discomfort. He was goofy. He was genuine. And he was cute.

Now, I live in his embrace. Every waking moment is in languish for his love. It’s almost painful to want someone so bad. Most of my romances existed only in a realm of unrequited feelings. But now I have my love, and yet I still desire him as if he didn’t know I existed.

Nothing has felt more right than in the moments that I spend with him. Nothing has ever made more since or came more easily. This must be true love, real love. And though I wallow in my fear of the future, I know this is right. I know that this is what people spend their lives searching for. I know this is what every jazz song, love story, or romance film is about. I know that this was meant to be.

Having something that others don’t even know exists. Belonging to a movement that will forever control the pits of your heart. Knowing that there is someone meant just for you and only you, is real. The experience of finding your soul mate and getting to hold them in your arms, and kiss their lips, and whisper softly in their ear that today you will love them, but tomorrow you will love them even more… is real.

Love is real. It is real, for I have found it and I am never letting go. Like a missing gem found at the bottom of the sea, I will cherish it. I will care for it. I will hold it in my grasp until my fingers grow weak and then I will hold it in my mouth and never speak another word again until my dying breath. When I will tell the world that: Love is real, for I have found it, and I will cherish it forever.

#love  #writing  #personal  #prose  #meh art  

I fell in love with a woman.

Her skin was so soft. Lips cherry red, and ripe. She spoke with the most elegant raspy voice. Her eyes were brown, deep brown, nearly black.

She told me stories of her love life, the men she had been with, the loves she had lost, the pain she felt. All the people she had adored, loved, and fucked. Her words were captivating. Tantalizing. I was in a complete trance. With every sound her mouth made, each letter and syllable that fell off her lips, I fell for her. I sunk for her. I drowned for her.

I stood there yearning for her affection. She had held me in her grip, and I did not want to leave. I wanted to be with her forever, and listen to her for days. I had never felt this way about a woman before - heck, I had never felt this way about anyone.

Stuck. My feet were paralyzed. As she made love to me with her eyes. She stroked me. Slowly, deeply, and sensually, with every sentence she made. All I could do was pine. And desire.

On the verge of tears, I wanted her. And for her to want me. I would beg for her. I would fight for her. I’d kill for her. I was lost, in the shape of her body, and the lust of her lips. I needed her.

But to her, I was no one. Just a fan. A spectator in the crowd. I fell in love with her, right there. Her, on the stage, singing out her heart, and me in the crowd, indulging in every moment of it.

#love  #writing  #personal  #fiction  #short story  #story  #meh art  

Oh, how I love you…

You are absolutely beautiful to me. I love your eyes, your nose, your lips, your chin, and your ears. I love hearing the sound of your voice, or the way you breathe when you sleep. The way just staring into your eyes can make me smile. And how I can NEVER get you off my mind. I love that no matter what we do together, I always enjoy myself, or when we kiss, how I always catch you with your eyes closed.

I love that you’re my best friend, and I could tell you ANYTHING, and you would never judge me. Or how we fight over who loves the other more. The fact that I can’t see myself living a moment without you, and though you get on my DAMN nerves, I am still madly in love with you.

Your laugh turns me on. And the way you can look at me for hours, and not say one word. I love holding hands with you in private, and pretending to argue with you in front of everyone around us. How we can make love, have sex, or fuck, and no matter what, I love it.

The way your eyes twinkle when you smile at me. The way your nose wrinkles after you sneeze. How you bite your lip when you watch me eat. When you place your chin on my forehead after we kiss. The way your body quivers when I nibble on your ear. Or the way you say “I love you”, and I still sounds surreal.

I just love everything about you.

#fiction  #personal  #prose  #love  #relationships  #writing  #meh art  

Those eyes.

Blue, like the sky on a clear summer’s day. No clouds in sight, just sun, and sky, and those eyes.

They glowed with every sentence heard. Dilated. Aching in beauty, needing to be fed. Yearning for more words, more stories, more life.

Sincere. When hurt, they would glimmer. Darken. Deepen. They became sad. Feeling pain just like you and I, but more intensely. More directly.

Those eyes could never lie. Never betray. They were always loyal. Always honest. They spoke truths that no man could tell. Told stories no woman could hear.

They were caring. Sensitive. And when in love, they closed, tightly, passionately. Feeling. Because they were alive. I felt them. I knew them.

I loved them. Those eyes.

#poetry  #freeverse  #prose  #eyes  #story  #personal  #writing  #meh art  

Isolation.

I listen to the sweet sound of my breathing. Deep, slow.

It is dark and I am alone. I lay on my bed staring at the ceiling. Questioning myself. My world. My life.

I seek an answer in the silence, a sign in the dark, but there is nothing. Just images of my window rail cast against the walls from the lights of speeding cars outside. Gulp. I swallow, and the sound fills the empty room like an amphitheater.

I get lost in thoughts of getting lost in thoughts. I try to force myself to focus, but my mind loves to wander onto forbidden paths. So I let it.

This is what happens when I disconnect myself from the world. I learn how to listen to my heartbeat, and not just feel it. I can hear my eyelids blink like windshield wipers. I am connected with myself in a manner never before reached. I feel one with myself, not needing anything or anyone.

Head against pillow. Eyes wide open. I release my mind into the wild terrains of my thoughts. Isolated from the world. I am free.

#isolation  #personal  #prose  #writing  #story  #silence  #darkness  #woods  #meh art  

Affair with a married man.

I should have known once I saw your wedding ring, you were no good. But for some reason your charm was so captivating. We worked together. You were my boss.

At first things were simple, you’d say hello with a smile, and a wink. As you walked past me you’d glide your hand, softly across my back. But then one day you looked at me. I was at my desk and I had just glanced up for a second, and there you were, standing across the room, staring.

I could see the emotions flood your eyes. You didn’t move an inch. You just stood there, like a lion, intimidating his prey. I was frozen. I couldn’t run, and there was no point cause you would have mauled me.

I stared back as fear flushed my face, for I had been caught in your trance. You wooed me with your eyes, and in that very moment, I had become all yours. Without words, you spoke to me. I had felt touched without one finger reaching my body. I felt you, and you felt me.

And there I was, having a love affair, with a married man.

#story  #short story  #fiction  #writing  #personal  #affair  #meh art  

Falling in love with a stranger.

Standing there on the train platform, eager to get to your next destination, you see a figure of a man. He’s tall, dark, with a muscular build. Your heart flickers slightly faster.

As he approaches, you see his face. Brown eyes, strong chin, lustful hair. Your pupils widen.

He walks toward you, your eyes meet, you look away, almost ashamed of your instant attraction.

As he floats past you, the smell of sweet lavender with a hint of mint lingers. You lick your lips in craving.

Turning your head to watch the fabric of his shirt gently hug the dimples of his back, he glances at you. Quickly you look down, nervously, defeated.

Just as soon as you found love, you lost it.

“Maybe I should have said something. Maybe he was the one.” Regretful thoughts rush through your mind.

The train obnoxiously pulls into the station. Abruptly, your thinking is interrupted. The doors open, you enter. Leaving behind that simple moment of love, along with the man you fell for.

#love  #stranger  #story  #short story  #writing  #personal  #fiction  #meh art  

I like you.

I don’t know whether its the way you look into my eyes and smirk,

or the way you can kiss me so passionately, pull away, and then collapse into the pillow as if you’ve experienced pure bliss.

I don’t know if it’s the way your eyes close whenever our lips touch,

or the way you so softly place your hand on my knee when you drive.

Maybe it’s the way you kiss my cheek so gently,

or rub your fingers around my head, or caress my body.

I don’t know if its the way you prevent yourself from getting “serious” to avoid attachment.

Or the slight excitement you get in your voice when I speak to you gently.

Maybe it’s the way you run your hand across my belly during passing, or the way you grab my hip to let me know your around.

I don’t know if its the way you can kiss on my neck to turn me on, or just to be intimate.

It could be your random bursts of anger, or song.

Or how you can seem so intimidating, but be so cute.

I don’t know if it’s the fact that you have more soul than anybody I have ever met, not for a white person, or a black person, but for anyone.

I have no idea what you do, to make me want to open up and tell you dumb stories from my childhood.

I don’t know what it is that makes me want to make love to you, or tend to your every need.

You make me want to change my mind about investment, and not being with the same person.

I want to run away with you, cut class and spend an entire day with you.

I like you, a lot. And I barely like my own mother.

And if I never see you again, I want you to know how I feel about you.

I like you, and everything you do.

#meh art  

all my thoughts, I try to hide them.

drowning in emotion cause I forgot to swim.

lights get dim. time to go to sleep.

but my brain is over flowing so I begin to weep.

words seep. into my pillow.

branching towards the sky, now I’m laying on a willow.

tree. I can’t see. I must have fell. did you hear me?

in love, I become silent.

love is blind, so I become blinded.

open eyes. there is the ceiling.

why did I have to awake from this feeling?

#meh art  

The Eye of the Beholder

It’s been awhile
Since a smile
Found it’s place
Pon my face
Evoked by a man
Contrary to those of his race.
I pace myself
To comatose my thinking
Over-zealous thoughts can cause me some sinking.
Drowning.
My reactions beget downward frowning
Or humiliation like some rainbow haired Bozo clowning.
Its because obsession pollutes my mind
Creates a global mental warming causing a feverish pine.
It’s a sign
That displays my yielding insanity,
But honestly, with my identity you can’t be mad at me
It’s part of my personality
Like the Bible in Christianity.
It won’t let go of me,
It’s got this infinite hold on me.
But even with that, I still catch the eye of man,
For I am the beholder, and I control whats in my hand.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009 at 9:33pm

#meh art  

Health

Its painstaking, the pain from the stake in my heart.
A lovewolf, was my being and my art.
Shot myself with silver bullets adding insult to my injuries,
but thats what happens when your feelings have discrepancies.
I dismissed all of my urgency,
and importance from all my emergencies.
Sitting in agony brought upon by myself,
completely raped of my happiness and my wealth.
Now that I only exist in stealth,
my mental instabilities have taken over my health.

Thursday, October 15, 2009 at 6:36pm

#meh art  

People tell me not to put up walls, but obviously I just need better security.

#truth  #personal  #currently  #quote  #meh art  

America is so naive, all false beauty brings him to his knees.

#America  #People believe anything  #ignorant  #gullible  #foolish  #meh art  

you spend so much time being the hero, you forgot what its like being saved.

#hero  #rescued  #life  #love  #quote  #truth  #personal  #meh art